Growing up as a child, I lived in a place where expressing my thoughts and feelings spontaneously was considered as a form of disobedience. There was a spoken rule between parents and children that respect is to be held up high, eventually forgetting that affection owns a much higher ground. It was a concept misunderstood by both, and in my case it led to a very lonely and sometimes unfulfilling childhood. Though being a happy child, there was always a kind of emptiness that left a pang in the pit of my stomach for never being able to express what I thought and felt.
So I looked for my own way out to self satisfaction and spent most hours of my days doodling and drawing on every blank paper I could find. I would pretend to be living the stories in my head, sometimes talking to myself as I did this. Laughing, and even crying if the plot didn’t go according to plan. In my head, I could yell and scream, kiss and be kissed, tell the truth and hear the truth. All in all, I was content.
Despite of the emptiness I felt then, I’m thankful that my attempt had actually led me to my path of self discovery. I can now express my thoughts and feelings they way I choose to be heard and recognized, regardless my past and background. The idea of being able to spread my thoughts to the world and to people such as you, for instance, is a satisfaction I crave on. Today, older and hopefully wiser, I am still the girl doodling away her dreams and filling the void that is no longer empty.
Thank you for being a part of my world, dear friends and strangers, even if it's just for a minute...